Aspects Of Living With A Disability - PART 2 - Carers
People come and go from your life, it's just the way things move along.
That saying could not be more true when it comes to the people that play a big role in my daily life, my carers.
Over the years, i've had more carers than I can count, and it's just something that I have had to adjust to, the best I can.
Most days there is someone here with me for 12 hours of the day. I often find myself feeling a bit like a bobble head being bounced around, but instead of being stuck on the dashboard of a car, i'm in my wheelchair. I fully understand that without my carers, I would not be able to do many of the things that I am fortunate enough to participate in, but it does not mean that it makes it any easier to adjust to.
In my lifetime, I have experienced many people making assumptions about me, just because i'm in a wheelchair. They may assume I am dumb, or incapable of speaking, when in fact i'm not dumb at all and can communicate just fine, but people ASSUME, which is unfair and rude. (Unfortunately it's just something that has been ingrained within society, and not everybody is understanding).
The people that do understand me and get a unique insight into who I am as a person, free from assumption, are my parents, family, carers and anyone else that has a close relationship with me.
However, when it comes to carers, sometimes the assumptions can not be avoided and I have had a few negative experiences, which has had a big impact on my confidence when new carers are entering my life. But I am always willing to give someone a chance, and try and teach them the best I can.
When you have people with you for 12 hours of the day, you want to know you can trust them, and feel comfortable with them. Especially when it comes to going on a holiday, or attending events.
I sometimes find that people don't listen to me, or there is a big gap in communication on both sides of the equation. I also have a bit of a bad habit of whispering instead of speaking loud and clearly (unless it's about Pokemon, of course).
These small issues can lead to large problems and an uncomfortable feeling, which isn't nice for anyone. Communication is such a vital part of the relationship between myself and my carers, because if the communication is lacking or has failed it leads to arguments and misunderstandings.
Another point is that nobody is the same, everybody does things their own way. Which can make it a bit difficult for me, because I may be used to someone doing something a certain way and then somebody does it differently, which quite often can throw me off a bit. It can sometimes be misconstrued as favouritism, but I think it is more based on habit. Especially when I have been doing something a certain way with one person for a long period of time.
I have different options that I offer up to carers to assist them in the process of transfers, etc., to ensure that it isn't too mentally draining on myself, because I often worry about the things that could go wrong (which has happened before, unfortunately) and due to previous experiences of people not following my advice.
These options are:
- Giving my carers two options of what way to go about the task at hand
- Dependent on the situation, there may only be one option, and if this is the case I talk them through the process that I feel most comfortable with
And again, COMMUNICATION is so important in these situations.
All I can say is, communication is such a vital part of the relationship with carers/workers/lifestyle assistants. Because if there is no communication, that is when things can go wrong, which isn't good for ANYBODY that may be involved in the situation.
Thankyou for reading,
Stephanie :)
That saying could not be more true when it comes to the people that play a big role in my daily life, my carers.
Over the years, i've had more carers than I can count, and it's just something that I have had to adjust to, the best I can.
Most days there is someone here with me for 12 hours of the day. I often find myself feeling a bit like a bobble head being bounced around, but instead of being stuck on the dashboard of a car, i'm in my wheelchair. I fully understand that without my carers, I would not be able to do many of the things that I am fortunate enough to participate in, but it does not mean that it makes it any easier to adjust to.
In my lifetime, I have experienced many people making assumptions about me, just because i'm in a wheelchair. They may assume I am dumb, or incapable of speaking, when in fact i'm not dumb at all and can communicate just fine, but people ASSUME, which is unfair and rude. (Unfortunately it's just something that has been ingrained within society, and not everybody is understanding).
The people that do understand me and get a unique insight into who I am as a person, free from assumption, are my parents, family, carers and anyone else that has a close relationship with me.
However, when it comes to carers, sometimes the assumptions can not be avoided and I have had a few negative experiences, which has had a big impact on my confidence when new carers are entering my life. But I am always willing to give someone a chance, and try and teach them the best I can.
When you have people with you for 12 hours of the day, you want to know you can trust them, and feel comfortable with them. Especially when it comes to going on a holiday, or attending events.
I sometimes find that people don't listen to me, or there is a big gap in communication on both sides of the equation. I also have a bit of a bad habit of whispering instead of speaking loud and clearly (unless it's about Pokemon, of course).
These small issues can lead to large problems and an uncomfortable feeling, which isn't nice for anyone. Communication is such a vital part of the relationship between myself and my carers, because if the communication is lacking or has failed it leads to arguments and misunderstandings.
Another point is that nobody is the same, everybody does things their own way. Which can make it a bit difficult for me, because I may be used to someone doing something a certain way and then somebody does it differently, which quite often can throw me off a bit. It can sometimes be misconstrued as favouritism, but I think it is more based on habit. Especially when I have been doing something a certain way with one person for a long period of time.
I have different options that I offer up to carers to assist them in the process of transfers, etc., to ensure that it isn't too mentally draining on myself, because I often worry about the things that could go wrong (which has happened before, unfortunately) and due to previous experiences of people not following my advice.
These options are:
- Giving my carers two options of what way to go about the task at hand
- Dependent on the situation, there may only be one option, and if this is the case I talk them through the process that I feel most comfortable with
And again, COMMUNICATION is so important in these situations.
All I can say is, communication is such a vital part of the relationship with carers/workers/lifestyle assistants. Because if there is no communication, that is when things can go wrong, which isn't good for ANYBODY that may be involved in the situation.
Thankyou for reading,
Stephanie :)
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